MOM ; a title above QUEEN.
Updated: Mar 7, 2021
It has been a while since I have been able to sit down and gather my thoughts to be able to write. I have had so much in my mind that it took a very long time. Well, here I am now...
Currently, I am in the most interesting season of my life. I have been getting ready to become a mother. YES, me! I feel like I am so late in life to be a mother but it is because all of my friends children are beyond elementary school lol. In other words, I feel late to the party.
Becoming a mother is a huge responsibility and I feel privileged to be able to take it on. I have been learning so much about my body and all the changes that are normal :) I have been learning what the baby needs from me like FOOD, WATER & VITAMINS. I have been seeing life differently through this new lens.It is totally different than anything I have experienced. Oh and about food,I have never consumed so much in my life lol. I see now that it is all necessary for her and I. Yes, its a girl! Overall my energy has been great and I am looking forward to all the new experiences. I am sure I will have tough days ahead but with God I know I will be able to make it through.
As a new mom I wish I was told a few things. So here is my list to all my first time momma's out there...
1) You will have all kinds of questions - it is normal. Ask people close to you, they will help you!
2) You have the option to use a Doctor or Midwife.
3) A Homebirth is an option for you. Ask many questions upfront to your midwife.
4) Birth Classes with your spouse/partner are necessary for the both of you to prepare practically, emotionally and spiritually.
5) Make sure to Avoid stressful situations so you can maintain your peace.
6) You may have to Limit your activities towards the end of your pregnancy, as you will move slow :-)
7) Only buy the clothes you need for the season you are in. I purchased 2 shirts, 2 dresses, 2 pairs of jeans and 2 pairs of leggings only. I have used them all over and over again and didn't spend too much at all.
8) A doula is not necessary but helpful in the delivery process. If you are unable to pay for one out of pockets, locally you may have a nonprofit programs than can assist you.
9) Utilize your spouse or partner as you will need their support. You may be the most vulnerable you have ever been in your relationship. But It will make you both stronger. And it will allow you both to support each other in the ebs and flows of pregnancy. If you do not have them available - utilize your friends, family and/or whatever community you have.
10) Your diet will dictate how you feel. Eat smart and frequently. Drink lots of water. ( I personally loved anything cold especially smoothies)
11) You control your experience. People will volunteer there pregnancy stories (it comes with the territory). Just know not everyone is the same and you have control over how you handle your experience. Be careful who you talk to as they can help to encourage or discourage your process. Stay in faith and do not let anyone ruin that for you.
12) Prayer works. Involve your pastors, close friends and intercessors. Tell them how they can pray for you, send them updates and praise reports. God uses them greatly to encourage you if you keep them involved! COMMUNITY IS IMPORTANT!
13) Read about everything! Learn it yourself. Gain knowledge so you feel confident with each decision that you make. Remember you have control over your experience. Regarding Postpartum, it does not have to be depressing in the sense that you let your emotions get the best of you. The reality is that a lot of changes happen in your life and in your body. With all of the adjusting happening to your life, take it one day at a time, keep your community involved and relax when you are able to. Make sure you are well. Take breaks when needed as self-care very important so your don't get overwhelmed and filled with anxiety and fear. Your family needs you well.
14) Breast Feeding is not mandatory. Learn about what you can do for your family and your work/life balance. Some may use formula mixed with breast milk and some others may just formula. It is ok. Learn what will work for you all as a family.
15) PHOTOS! Yes they are expensive, but Save for them and get them done. Don't regret not taking professional photos.
16) Prepare as much as you can, but its ok if everything is not done. Just breathe!
17) Books that helped me: My Bible, The Whole 9 Months : A Week-By-Week Pregnancy Nutrition Guide with Recipes for a Healthy Start and Supernatural Childbirth by Jackie Mize
18) Stand your ground. When you walk into doctors office they will always tell you worst case scenarios and a bunch of hypotheticals. Make sure to maintain your faith and remain educated, because you will be pressed to make decisions. Just make sure your choices are made in wisdom and not in fear. You establish your atmosphere. You are momma and you have the authority Jesus has given you. Exercise it to protect your child and yourself and your family.
19) Pray over your child. Pray and declare the Word of God over them. Pray and speak to them as they grow. Tell them how loved they are and how they are being knitted in your womb by Jehovah himself. What a blessing! Don't forget the miracle you're taking place in.
20) Thank God. Thank God for every high and every lo in pregnancy. Remember at this time in your life you are partnering with Him. He has things under control even the not so good stuff. Don't allow anxiety or fear to take over you. Stay grateful, He has you covered and every good and perfect gift comes from above. He loves you and He has brought you this far, will He not take you the rest of the way?
If you are out there wondering why I am sharing so much about this season of my life, well I wondered the same. The truth is not everyone can sit down wit you and give you the 411 on everything! But someone like me, a planner needs to know things so I need the information upfront so I can do what I need to do to get myself together. I just like to feel prepared and put forth my best effort with new things. So I thought why not blog about this experience. I hope it helps at least one person. So share this with new moms, share this with people who need encouragement in pregnancy even and may it be used to help to empower them!
Let me tell you something in this time I have had the most amazing times with God. I have felt Holy Spirit so close to me. I have felt The Word of God rush over me with such truth. I have felt his presence more deeply in this time unlike before. It has settled me in so many moments of trouble.
I have had so many times that anxiety and so much fear would sweep over me because of so many unknowns but when I would pray and say" Lord you know all things, nothing surprises you and I trust you". I would feel this assurance in His presence. I would pray out loud The Word of God! I prayed out the scriptures below....
Hebrews 4:12 For the word of Godis living and active.Sharper than anydouble-edged sword,it pierces even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow.It judges the thoughts and intentionsof the heart.
The word of God has power. Never forget it.
It is ALIVE.
As I have I been rearranging the entire home! Yes the whole place and there are only so many things you can do in a 2 bedroom townhouse! :-) I remember the Lord letting me know that last year 2020 was the year of Preparation. From the beginning to the end of the year He was 100% correct and I am glad that is what I have been doing.
With that being said, I believe 2021 will be a phenomenal year! I anticipate a lot of goooood things! You and I have been through a challenging time but one thing I can say is GOD IS GOOD! No matter the hardships that try to come to cripple our faith - HIS GOODNESS DOESN'T CHANGE!
So if your a new mom like me or a current momma - please be kind to yourself. Don't put too much pressure on yourself. Don't allow the things happening around you to dictate how you walk. If you learn to trust God then everything will be ok! Learn to partner with Him. Can worry add to our days? No it cannot. So stop the stressing and choose not to worry. Embrace life and all of its uncertainties. We cannot control what happens even though sometimes we think it can make us feel secure (i'm so guilty of this) but allow yourself to rely of The Maker of Heaven and Earth!
In this new season we are walking into I will be sure to keep you all up to date! It has been a beautiful journey of writing about all kinds of things this last year! But I am sure blogs may look a little differently moving forward! Pray for us as we embrace on the path of Parenting! Thank you for following me on this journey of writing, walking by faith and just being adventurous! I appreciate you!
I am praying for you all that you would have a personal encounter with Jesus even as you read this! If it weren't for The Lord I have no idea where I would be. I wouldn't be able to survive one day without Him! So if you don't know Jesus, please get to know Him!
Until next time, I pray you have a blessed week!